and the air is thin and it blows through your skin and it feels like something is about to begin

dear world,

i can't admit to anything.
i let my thoughts consume me and i lie and tell everyone i'm open.

you don't know my head.
the inner workings of my brain drive me insane.

nothing feels right anymore.
i have a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.
i feel like a terrible person.

because i'm lying to all of you.
i can't tell anyone what i really am thinking, because admitting it would feel all to real.
i wonder why i feel this way.

because i love you.
more then i have ever loved anyone else.
more then i can ever love anyone.
and i want you to know how i feel.
i want you to want to know about me.
i wanted to be on that list.

i'm sick of somedays and eventually.
i'm sick of wondering what will happen.


----------------

this stupid poem class has me getting all emotional.
i keep thinking and writing.
and i hate what comes out.

all i want right now is your arms around me.
i feel so sad and all i want is a hug and sweet words to make me feel happy.


lovezzz.
-Alisha<3